Boris Johnson Visits Bath

Yesterday, on May 4th 2007 I met one of the few living people whom warrant my veneration, for today Boris Johnson attended a Conservative meeting in Bath.

Several of my peers and aquaintences were sceptical about whether his speech would be of any relevance whatsoever, and even after his appearance some were left with the presiding belief that he was a ‘bumbling idiot’, but to those of us who take Mr Johnson as seriously as his intellect deserves, we were not disappointed.

Whilst talking about more national issues than many expected, baring in mind the council elections were held only a day previously, Mr Johnson produced such fine statements (albeit paraphrased) as “Tony Blair is doing his farewell tour on an open top submarine” and when mentioning Bath Conservative PPC Fabian Ritcher, pronouncing himself as the “president of the Fabian Society”. When talking about the stupidity of regulation on booster seats, Boris claimed that people of his age did not come to any harm without such pointless regulation, accentuating his point that such trivial matters should be at the discretion of parents.

Although clearly in a hurry, Johnson was doubtlessly in fine form; talking to his loyal supporters seemed to flow from his heart as effortlessly as the Latin prose that he spouted to the audience. When shaking his hand I was able to splurt out in the utmost sycophancy: “It’s an honour to meet you sir”, only to hear the response “yes yes, an honour to meet you”.

And so Bath CF left, myself personally feeling slightly bemused but altogether overjoyed after an afternoon that we won’t forget in a long while.